Every relationship requires intimacy for it to be successful, but it is important to remember that connecting with your partner goes beyond just being physically intimate with each other. Intimacy and building trust are essential aspects of your relationship that require constant work in order for it to prosper in the long run.
It takes trust to make a relationship work successfully, and in this article, we highlight ways to help build intimacy and trust between you and your partner. This will not only help strengthen your bond, but also help create meaningful moments between you two, and become an aid in overcoming your intimacy fears.
Why Is Intimacy Important In A Relationship?
Whether you’re in a long-term relationship, planning on getting married, or starting a family, working on overcoming your intimacy fears and building trust will help you both understand each other better and make sure that you’re both on the same page when it comes to decision-making. You both will remain strong in the face of adversity.
By actively working on building trust in your relationship, it will help strengthen your bond and help get down to the serious emotions and feelings that will help you build a long-lasting life together.
12 Ways To Building Trust In Your Relationship
1. Investing In Coaching Or Therapy
Some relationships can come with a lot of emotional baggage stemming from childhood or past relationships. Sometimes neither one of you may know how to adequately deal with it, and if you don’t confront it properly when your relationship is starting to get serious, then it can turn into a blockade that will prevent you two from moving forward and building trust in your relationship.
It is at this time when you should consider consulting a professional to help unravel the knots in your relationship. There is no shame in consulting an AI couples coach or going for couples therapy to get a better understanding of each other and overcome your intimacy fears.
This process is healthy for you both to undergo, as it will help you understand the hurdles that you need to overcome together to reach the future you both want, whether it’s deepening your intimacy or finding ways to build trust in your relationship.
2. Spending Time To Talk Deeply With Each Other
How well do you actually know your partner? Chances are, what you do actually know may just be surface-level information that doesn’t really reflect their wants and desires. To overcome this, section off time in your day to talk with each other - and not just “how was your day?” type of conversation.
Engage in deep conversations that touch on topics about what you want and expect from each other and the relationship. This way you won’t be taken by surprise when you both are already married and one partner expresses life-changing wants - like one partner wanting children while the other doesn’t. This can be a serious deal-breaker, so it is best discussed early on.
Also talk about other serious topics like expectations when you live together - such as splitting finances, family matters, and most importantly setting boundaries with each other. This will help overcome the fear of the future and can be a building blockfor deeper intimacy and trust.
3. Engaging In Parallel Play
This is an activity inspired by how toddlers interact with each other. This is a great way for adults to connect with each other and overcome their fear of intimacy, without having to directly interact with one another.
Parallel play is when two or more people physically occupy the same space but are engaged in their own tasks. This shows that you are present with them and providingcomfort with your presence, despite not engaging with them. This can be a powerful tool for building trust in your relationship.
To explain this type of interaction better is a couple spending time together in the same room while one partner is knitting while the other is reading. This kind of interaction is great for couples whose hobbies are quite different and not quite interesting to the other person. It shows that you don’t have to like the same things tospend time together.
Essentially, you are showing independence, and not relying on your partner to engage in activities that they aren’t fond of. However, this doesn’t mean that you both should sit in silence, you can talk and hold conversations - it’s just not doing theprimary activity together.
4. Exchange Daily Affirmations
Hearing the right words at the right times is a type of sentiment that can move someone to tears. You never know what hardship the next person is going through and the same can be extended to your partner.
By saying kind words to them or offering encouragement can be just what they need to take on the day. It shows that you support and care for your partner and these kind words can give a boost of encouragement and allay any fears or anxiety they might be experiencing. It costs nothing to be kind and helps foster a deeper bond between you two.
5. Be Both Spontaneous And Plan Out Dates
Balance is very important for a relationship. You can be spontaneous with your partner and plan out intricate and thoughtful dates for them. Also, encourage them todo the same for you.
For example, every so often, you can surprise your partner with a spur-of-the-moment outing that they would like. You can wake up one Saturday morning and take a drive to visit nearby hotspots or even eat out at a restaurant you haven’t tried yet. You can also visit local tourist attractions that you may have not gotten around to visiting yet. Just go and have a full day of fun.
On the other hand, take time out to think out and curate planned dates. Think of places that you and your partner love to frequent and spend an afternoon at this special place. Alternatively, you can plan out a picnic or a day at the beach to spend quality time with each other.
6. Listen to your partner’s troubles
Every day won’t be a good day - and that is completely normal. But when these days make an appearance, you ought to be the shoulder your partner can lean on when they are troubled.
When your partner is expressing their discomfort to you in any way, you need to confirm that you hear and understand them while being respectful of their decisions. This discomfort can range from their day at work, discomfort with something about the relationship, or any boundaries that they would like to establish.
In turn, they should extend the same kindness to you, and be there for you when you need to vent or express yourself. This is only possible if you connect and communicate with each other efficiently and focus on building trust by overcoming your intimacy fears.
7. Spending Time Away From Each Other
What can start off as relying on each other can easily turn into an unhealthy relationship built on codependency. While spending time with each other is key to building your relationship’s intimacy, you also need to be able to live separately from each other.
Having a life outside of your relationship can be beneficial, as it will help you grow and become more independent. Spend time with family and friends and go on outings with them. If you and your partner want to try an alternative form of fun activity, you could even hire a male escort for the day, spend some time away from your partner, and later surprise them with a fun addition, like a three person fun date.
8. Perform Acts Of Kindness
This is similar to saying words of affirmation to each other but through actions instead of exchanging words. It shows that you’re being kind to your partner - but this doesn’t mean doing chores once in a while. Rather, it involves doing things for them consistently that aids trust building and helps overcome intimacy fears in your relationship.
You need to be genuine with your actions and do things that your partner would appreciate. Maybe cook them their favorite meal, or make them a cup of tea or coffee when they need it. Pick flowers for them, call them when they’re on your mind, or write a love letter once in a while.
9. Practice Non-Sexual Touches
Physical intimacy is important in a relationship, but not all intimacy needs to be sexual in nature. Spend time with each other and practice platonic touching. For example, if you’re watching television together you can hug or cuddle, or if you’re out and about hold hands when walking.
10. Be Supportive Of Each Other
Being a supportive partner is extremely important, and it can have a far greater impact than you think. It shows that you have confidence in them, their ideas, and their skills.
Sometimes, some of your partners may not seem like a very good idea, but the key is to express your concerns kindly and still show them support. If things go pear-shaped, be there to help them get back up again and encourage them to give it another go.
11. Reminisce With Each Other
Rekindling the romance can help with the intimacy of the relationship plateaus. It is a good idea to revisit why you both fell in love with each other in the first place. Revisit the places where you both had your first date, when you realized your feelings for each other, or when you first said ‘I love you’ to each other. It will help reignite the flames in your relationship, aid your trust building attempts, and help you overcome those intimacy fears.
12. Buying Gifts For Each Other
Relationships go beyond monetary means, but buying a gift is a thoughtful act. It shows that you saw something and it reminded you of them, or it would be something that they liked. Gift your partner something they have been thinking about or subtly mentioning, such as flowers they like or trinkets they have been admiring.
Small gestures can go a long way, for example, if you’re dating someone who is into alternative fashion, you can buy them a pair of unique plugs for their gauges. If your partner is into coquette fashion, a pretty set of bows will be welcomed warmly. It shows that you actually pay attention to them and their interests. Plus, many people’s primary love language is gift giving and receiving. If that sounds like your partner, you can build trust in your relationship by showing up with little gifts for them now and then.
Building trust and relationship intimacy with your partner is an important aspect of a long-lasting relationship. It will help you understand each other better, and it will help you overcome struggles, thanks to the better communication skills that you will develop through deepening your intimacy with each other.