Couply AI has just been launched and I thought let's just see exactly what it can do.
An AI Relationship Coach is such a new and amazing thing, being able to ask any questions you have about your relationships and getting immediate help and advice is so fantastically evolved.
I was thinking about the differences between a weekly in person therapist and an AI coach that's always available, all of the problems or queries you have about your relationship could be answered immediately rather than waiting and most likely forgetting by the time it comes to meeting with your therapist.
So, I decided on an experiment – to let Couply AI run my relationship for a whole week to see just what it can do.
All day every day – anything to do with my relationship I asked my Couply AI Coach and would do what it would say!
How I Let my Couply AI Coach Run my Relationship
I started on Monday. My partner and I live together and he works full time and I study full time so we see each other briefly in the mornings, in the evenings and on the weekends.
Every conversation I had with my partner that had me feeling any negative emotion I went and spoke to my AI Coach about it and followed her advice.
Any query I had throughout the week about what to do with my partner and date ideas for the weekend, I asked my AI Coach and... Ifollowed everything she said.
Any arguments or issues I felt, I went straight to my AI Coach, spoke it over with her and followed her advice. I mean when I tell you I genuinely let my AI Coach run my whole relationship in every aspect for a week, I did.
AI Coach Helping With Relationship Arguments
On the second day of this experiment I had an argument with my partner, nothing big but still something that continued to bother me.
We argued over commitments, I wanted him to be at a family commitment and he wanted to be at his own commitment. I think the argument had upset me mainly because it was my family commitment and I felt he should be there despite his commitment.
So I asked Couply AI, and this is what she said:
“First, have a calm and honest conversation with him. Explain why it's so important for you to spend time with your family right now and how it would mean the world to you. Help him understand the significance of this visit and the impact it would have on your relationship with your family. Then, see if you can find a compromise that works for both of you…”
And I did! After work I phoned him and we discussed everything, we came to a compromise where he could go to his commitment and if he had time afterwards he would come to my family commitment and then in a few days come and see my family then as well.
Openly discussing my feelings on the matter made the conversation so much easier and my AI Coach really helped by telling me to explain to him the significance of the visit to me.
Honestly, perhaps a bad habit, but typically I never usually discuss why something is important to me only that it is important to me, and it really made all the difference.
I really think my AI Coach helped me to take a step back from the argument and communicate my feelings better as well as understanding his needs along with my own.
AI Coach Helping With my Date Nights
On Wednesday I told my AI Coach that my partner had a really stressful day and I wanted to do something to lift his mood when he got home. She suggested making a blanket fort in my living room, she said:
“Since his love language is quality time, i have the perfect idea for you. How about creating a cozy atmosphere by setting up a blanket fort in your living room? Get pillows, blankets, fairy lights, and create a little den where you both can snuggle up.”
As you can see from our fort picture above, I did just that!
He came in from work and I had dinner ready and the fort set up, we jumped in and had our dinner in the fort while watching Harry Potter (his favourite movie).
He kept telling me how happy he was and he looked so relaxed and comfortable, I'm so glad I did this date night as it was a nice surprise for him and an easy date night to do during the week when we’re both too tired to go out.
On Friday night I asked my AI Coach what we should do for date night and she recommended doing something nice for dinner:
“It's awesome that you’re looking forward to Friday night date night with him. Since his love language is quality time, it's great to plan something that allows you guys to spend meaningful time together. How about a delicious meal together that has a special significance for you two? If you want to make it special how about re-enacting your first date?”
So I booked the restaurant that we went to on our first date and our one year anniversary to make it meaningful, asked him to meet me there after work and I got all dressed up to go!
We had such a lovely evening and it was so connecting and romantic having dinner in such a special and meaningful place to us. Way to go, AI.
AI Turned me Into a Top Tier Girlfriend
Now this is actually something I didn't think the AI Coach would do, I thought she would help with date ideas, arguments and communication but I never for a second thought she would improve me as a partner in one week.
The past week there were two evenings where I asked my AI Coach for help on what I could do because we had been clashing and I felt really stressed about it and I know he was stressed too.
During my conversations with the AI Coach I slowly noticed every piece of advice she gave me had things to help me and things to help him in these off moments we were having.
It completely opened my eyes to the fact that I was wanting so much more from him when I myself wasn't giving him much either. I decided to take full advantage of this experiment and I took every bit of advice.
In the spare time I had, I'd ask her if she had ideas – and I did anything she said, for him and our relationship.
I usually find it difficult in these situations but during this experiment, when I started to speak to him more, I realised how much stress he was under this week and really, when I thought about it; this week especially I have a few more hours a week free which could be used to help relieve his stress and make our times together better.
When I had all of these conversations with the AI Coach she told me:
“It's great that you’re looking for ways to support him during this busy and stressful week. Since his love language is quality time, here's what you can do:
1. Offer your understanding and empathy: Let him know that you understand how hectic his week is and that you're there for him. Being supportive and empathetic can make a huge difference in relieving stress.
2. Plan a relaxing date night: Schedule a special evening just for the two of you to unwind and relax. It could be as simple as cooking a nice meal or watching a movie. The important thing is that you’re fully present and engaged during this quality time together.
3. Take care of the little things: Since he is going through a busy time, try to alleviate his load by taking on some of his responsibilities if possible. Whether it's running errands, doing household chores, or taking care of anything that can give him some breathing space.”
So one evening I organised the house, did all the household tasks and made him his favorite dinner with his favorite wine waiting for him to get in from work.
YEAH I KNOW.
Another night, I went and did the weekly food shop.
HOW AWESOME AM I?
I knew this would help him to know he has lunch stuff there and all the dinner sorted for the week.
NOW ARE YOU READY FOR THE BIG ONE?
I cooked dinner every night that week, having it ready for him walking in the door.
I told you, gf in god mode.
Not every week will be like this obviously.
But having my partner go through an especially stressful time – at a time when I think I might have been way less sympathetic – using Couply AI to talk about this with just happened to be perfect timing.
I think doing this really opened my mind up to what I can do to be a better partner.
It helped to think about the areas that I have any free time in and the benefit using that time to do something for my partner would have. It really made me take a step back and instead of thinking what he could be better, he should do this etc I started thinking what can I do that would benefit both of us and him.
What helped things a lot was just how appreciative my partner was each day. It made me feel so cherished and in a way it was nice that I could be there for him.
Would I Use My Couply AI Coach Again?
Absolutely!
I dove right into the deep end with Couplys AI Coach by letting her run my relationship for a week but I feel like she helped me a lot.
She brought different perspectives and a simpler way to communicate for arguments and disagreements, she gave me great date ideas that used our connection to have a romantic evening, she gave me ways to support my partner when I really wasn't sure how to!
I love the way that I was guided through difficult questions and worrying moments, she gave me multiple options for each query and question, she used her knowledge from our relationship quizzes on Couply to help us both, she knew exactly what works for both of us due to our love languages, attachment, check-ins and helped accordingly.
I think even after only one week of running my relationship, that my Couply AI Coach has benefitted my relationship a lot.
I feel so happy and content knowing that I had such an amazing and happy week with my partner because I was able to communicate better, plan date nights, and support him in many ways.
I will continue using my AI Coach and using the advice she's given me when I need help in my relationship!
Seen on TV
Couply's AI relationship coach was recently featured on Global News!
About the Author
Tegan Confield is a Content Coordinator for the Couply app. Couply was created to help couples improve their relationships. Couply has over 300,000 words of relationship quizzes, questions, couples games and date ideas and helps over 400,000 people.
Tegan Confield is also a Psychology Student, and studying at the University of Stirling.
You can connect with Tegan Confield on LinkedIn here and on Instagram here.
